Reclaiming Sex

Own your pleasure. It’s yours to enjoy. Therefore, it’s your responsibility.

So often, we give the full power of our pleasure over to our partners. And when they don’t live up to our (generally uncommunicated) expectations, we either blame and resent them or weaponize it against ourselves. Either something’s wrong with them because they didn’t provide you with the pleasure you were seeking, or something’s wrong with you.

But none of that is really true. It’s just that you were operating under the belief that your pleasure was their responsibility, which makes sense. It’s what we’re conditioned to believe. We leave it up to them to determine what we feel…and then get pissed when they don’t make us feel what we want to feel.

It’s not their responsibility, though. And it’s not even within their control.

I know you’ll want to argue with that point, but how many times have you been with a partner and things aren’t going exactly the way you want them to, yet you don’t speak up? You fake an orgasm just to get it over with. You pretend things are fine when they’re not. You’re not at all into something but go along with it just to avoid ruffling feathers.

And then you resent your partner for not doing things the right way.

Stop handing over the power of your pleasure. Reclaim the reins. Take ownership of your own pleasure.

*If your knee-jerk reaction to that is “FUCKING HOW???” you need to join Project Reclamation.